I have throughout my life, struggled with self-esteem. As I small child I was quite shy and reclusive. I had very severe eczema, head to toe, so looked and felt awful for a good 8 years or so, from about 6 years old. When I hit my teenage years, the eczema started to improve and I did everything I could to make up for lost time and the consequences were sometimes quite shocking. I am and always have been drawn to extremes.
My upbringing was wonderful, but praise was never commonplace, so much so that an unfounded seed of insecurity was planted and took hold. There was always someone better, brighter, prettier, more intelligent, and more talented.
Now lots of people who know me well will be raising their eyebrows and rolling their eyes. How is she describing herself as shy or insecure? But we are all very adept at only showing people what we want them to see.
Anyway, a dear friend and mentor of mine recently mentioned the following passage. It is commonly misattributed to Nelson Mandela's 1994 Inaugural Address but actually comes from the book 'A Return To Love' (1992) by Marianne Williamson, an American spiritual teacher, author and lecturer.
It is a beautiful passage and makes me feel empowered in a really humble way, if that makes sense. It is quite religious, but I don’t think that you need to be to take in the sentiment. You may know it already but I wanted to share it with you, because sometimes reiteration is a lovely thing: "...Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate.
Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure.
It is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us.
We ask ourselves, who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, fabulous?
Actually, who are you not to be?
You are a child of God.
Your playing small does not serve the world.
There is nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people won't feel insecure around you.
We are all meant to shine, as children do.
We were born to make manifest the glory of God that is within us.
It's not just in some of us; it's in everyone.
And as we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same.
As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others."